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Monday, October 17, 2022

2022-34 || hungry before bedtime


Went to Richmond this weekend and satisfied a craving for greasy, salty, raise your blood pressure Chinese food. We visited the food court at President Plaza at lunch, and it was full of people. Felt authentically like we were in Asia, in a cramped dirty food court with mostly Asian customers.

We settled on Chef Cong Cong, because it wasn't as busy as the other places. Line ups went around the eating area for some places! 

We ordered the pork bone noodles (bottom in photo) and the silken tofu soup. Would recommend both. The meat from the pork bones peeled right off and were so tender that they just melt in your mouth. The fat added to the flavor of the broth. Of course, I needed to drink a liter of water after, because of the salt and MSG, but that's the sacrifice for Chinese food. The silken tofu soup had cilantro and preserved vegetables, which paired tremendously well with the large hunk of soft tofu. Really hit the spot.

Weekend is over now though, and even though it's only Monday, I have already cried four times because I don't want to go back to working hard at taking care of the kids and the house. I get so hungry because there isn't enough time to eat properly. I also don't prioritize eating because I'm already too tired to make an extra meal or even a snack, and might as well wait for the next meal. Right now, it's 10PM and my stomach is starting to grumble...

My parents actually bring lunch for me and the kids, and if they didn't, I'd probably lose even more weight than I already have. Blessing and a curse though, because I feel like sometimes, I get so angry with the way they behave and speak. If I try to argue my point, my mom gets upset, so now, I try to ignore the things she says without letting her abrasive tone trigger me. She cares so much about her grandkids and me and H, she just expresses it in a different manner.

In an ideal world, she would stop saying things about how the kids are dressed, how they're eating, and whether they are comfortable or not, because her anxieties cause me anxiety. However, the world is not perfect, so this winter, maybe I'll let my kids run around in t-shirts and shorts, if they want to. Just to see what happens... 

Don't worry though. I've also laughed and smiled a hundred times today, so it balances out the crying. I'm allowed to express all my feelings, okay? Nothing wrong with a few tears.

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